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  It seemed like my whole attitude changed once I found out that Flip had cheated on me. I confronted him about the girl who called him and he admitted that he slept with her. He said she meant nothing and that it only happened twice, but that didn't make it hurt any less.

  The betrayal alone was enough for my whole world to come crashing down. Never in a million years did I think he would do that to me. Call me stupid or naive, but I never saw it coming. At one point, Flip treated me like I was his queen. He wouldn't even look at another woman, so the thought of him sleeping with one was sickening to me.

  Since then, Flip showed me the text where he told the girl that he wanted to be with his family. He blocked her number, but I couldn't block the memory. Nothing was the same after that even though he became more attentive toward me and Zariyah. We talked and text all the time, and he spent every weekend with us but the damage was already done.

  We finally talked about moving in together and decided it would be best to wait until the semester ends. Six months ago, I would be jumping for joy at the idea, but I was kind of blah about the situation.

  I loved Flip to death still; I just didn't admire him anymore. I didn't believe in him. Hell, I really didn't believe in anything anymore.

  I walked out of the building feeling slightly sorry for myself. Once I made it to my car, I called Flip like I always did.

  "How was your day, beautiful?" he asked when he answered the phone.

  I can't lie, I still smiled when I heard Flip's voice but now I hated myself for being such a fool for him.

  "It was good," I lied. "What about you and ZaZa?”

  "We over at my mama house chillin'. She’s been bugging me about her for the longest about seeing her grand baby so I went on and brought her out here."

  "That’s nice. Tell your mama I said hey."

  "You tell her," he said, handing his mama the phone.

  I talked to Ms. Martha for a few minutes before Flip got back on the line.

  "How much longer are y'all going to be?” I asked.

  "Probably another hour or two. Why? You need something? "

  "A nap," I answered truthfully. I desperately needed the rest. My mind, body, and soul were tired.

  "Okay, rest up baby. We'll see you later. I love you."

  "I love you too.”

  CHAPTER 3 - CHANGE

  When I made it home, I went straight to the bedroom and crawled into my bed. Before I knew it I was out like a light.

  The sound of someone pounding at my door caused my eyes to fly open. My heart was racing but my body was so tired, I couldn’t even move. I almost dozed back off until I heard the pounding again. I pulled myself out the bed and opened the door to find my aunt standing with a frown etched on her face.

  "Who the hell has been touching my damn air conditioner?”

  “It gets really hot in here and ZaZa gets cranky when it's hot."

  Aunt Mel pulled her hand from behind her back and shoved a bill in my face. "Look at my god damn light bill! Don't touch my damn thermostat!"

  I rubbed my eyes. "Sorry auntie"

  "Sorry ain't worth shit!" She yelled. She tapped the bill. "I need some money. You done had that nigga laid up in here for months. So, what? He lives here now? "

  "He not here every day." Technically, he wasn’t.

  "He here enough! I'm pulling his damn drawers out my washing machine! That seem like he stays here to me."

  I sighed and leaned against the door. I didn't have the energy for Aunt Mel's bullshit. "Aunt Mel, I gave you six hundred dollars out my refund check."

  "That ain't shit! If you going to stay here, I’m going to need four hundred a month."

  I was taken aback by her request. "Where am I going to get that type of money?”

  "Ask your nigga! He a big drug dealer out here; he got it!"

  I shook my head and Aunt Mel shook hers too.

  "You can't be that damn dumb, girl. Why you think they call him Flip?" She scoffed and rolled her eyes. "The nigga can lay up and fuck, he should be able to make sure you got a roof over your head."

  I didn't realize I rolled my eyes until Mel snapped at me. "Roll your eyes all you want, you dumb ass girl, but your free ride is up. You ain't about to bring no more babies in here."

  She turned around and stormed away. "Four hundred a month or you and that hollering ass baby gots to go! You better file child support and get some TANF, ‘cus you ain't smart enough to make it on your own. Book smart will only take you so far, you need to be street smart to be a mother. You need some damn common sense! "

  I knew going back to sleep wasn't an option, so I just laid across the bed, thinking about what my next move would be. My feelings were hurt, but I didn't have time to dwell on it.

  Less than an hour later, Flip entered the room and laid ZaZa down on the bed. She was knocked out cold, thankfully.

  Flip laid on the bed next to me and slapped my butt. "What’s up Booty? I see your aunt in one of her moods, she didn't even speak back to a nigga."

  "She mad about her light bill,” I replied, dryly.

  "How much is it? I'll pay it," Flip answered with a shrug. As crazy it was, I was never in Flip's pockets like that. I knew he always had money, but I never knew just how much.

  "I don't know," I answered with a shrug. I flipped over so that I was facing him. "Are you a king pin?”

  Flip laughed loudly at my question. I looked at him seriously. "Why do they call you Flip? How deep in the streets are you?"

  "I hustle. Hard. That's how I got my name." He tapped my nose playfully. "I can't be in the streets too much, I’m always with you."

  "Apparently you're here too much," I sighed. I scooted my body towards Flip and rested my head in his lap.

  “What happened?” he quizzed.

  I gave Flip a rundown on what went down.

  "So, for some reason she feels like you're stacked and now she wants four hundred a month or me and ZaZa have to move out."

  "What? Hell naw, man. I could see if she needed it, but your auntie on section 8. She pays a little over a hundred a month."

  "Really?"

  "Hell yea. She’s trying to come up. I just gave her three hundred last month."

  That was news to me. My eyes grew wide. "For what?”

  "She started complaining about bills and shit so on GP, I tossed her some money."

  "Who's GP?"

  Flip gave me a funny look before laughing. "Bae, you can't be that much of a square." When I blinked up at him, waiting for an answer, he shook his head. "GP means, like, just because."

  "So what does the G and the P stand for?"

  Flip paused before shrugging. "I don't know. Shit, it’s just what we say."

  I pulled out my phone and Googled the meaning. "Urban dictionary says it stands for General Principle."

  Flip smiled at me before leaning down to kiss me. "You are something else."

  We had a good laugh about that for a while before Aunt Mel came bursting through the door. She held up a tiny bag of marijuana. "See, this the type of shit I will not put up with."

  I looked up at Flip, with questioning eyes. He shrugged at me, and then looked at Mel. "That ain't mine."

  "So whose is it and why is it in my house?”

  "I really don't know Aunt Mel."

  "I must have boo boo the fool written on my damn forehead!" She slammed her hand against the door. "Whose is it?"

  Her outburst caused me to jump. Flip looked at ZaZa who starting squirming. "Calm down, we can-"

  "Nigga who the fuck you talking to? This my shit!” She said, pointing to herself.

  “You don’t tell me to calm down in my motherfuckin’ house. If I wanted to break all the windows in this bitch, I can!"

  "A’ight,” Flip waved his hand. "Tripping" he mumbled.

  Aunt Mel walked closer with her hand cupped behind her ear. "What? What you say? "

  By this time I was sitting up, trying to diffuse the situation. "He didn't say anything."

  "I didn't think so!"

  Flip gently pushed me off his lap and got out of the bed. "I'm about to burn."

  "Bye!" she yelled, waving her hand.

  "Mel, come on. Stop antagonizing him!" I added.

  eyes grew large. "Bitch, you can go to. All y'all get the hell out my house."

  "Mel, hold on.” Flip saw where this situation was headed and knew it wasn’t worth it. “It’s not that serious.”

  "Get the fuck out!" Mel reiterated on her way out the room.

  Speechless, I turned around and looked at Flip. His expression matched mine. His face immediately hardened.

  "You not about to blame this on me, are you? She came in here with it on her mind. She wanted some problems."

  "Where'd the weed come from?”

  "My nigga, I don't fuckin’ know!” he yelled. “She was holding a nick sack. The shit I fuck with don't come in no nick sack and it won’t be no bullshit Reggie.” He peered into my eyes. “That ain't mine, Zuri. I don't have that shit around my daughter."

  I believed Flip, which was rare these days. I had no idea where the weed came from or why Mel was so mad. I wanted to cry, but I just didn't have the strength.

  Flip pulled me in his arms and almost smothered me in his embrace. "I'mma take you and Za to my mama house until your aunt calms down, okay?"

  "Where will you be?”

  I felt his initial hesitation, so it meant nothing when he replied. "I'll be there too. We are in this together."

  I was out of options so I had no choice but to take his word for it.

  I knew I should have been cautious. I knew I should have known better.

  CHAPTER 4 – HOME?

  Flip turned on the radio to drown out the silence that was looming in the air as we
drove to his mother’s house. Despite trying to come to an agreement with Aunt Mel, she insisted she wanted me to leave.

  I couldn’t figure out what I did that was so bad, but Flip told me not to worry about it. Still, it bothered me that I had to uproot my life and move back to the south side of Houston, only to still be living under someone else’s roof.

  Flip’s mother had always been kind to me and I had a good relationship with his sister, but I didn’t want to move in with them. I truly wanted to be in my own place.

  “So, how long are we supposed to stay with your mama?” I finally asked.

  “Not too much longer,” Flip answered, keeping his eyes on the road. “I gotta pay some shit off to clear my name and we’ll be good.”

  “I can just put the apartment in my name.”

  Flip shook his head. “That’s not how it works. Your name will actually be worse than mine. You’re a first time renter so it will be all type of extra shit to do.” He glanced over at me with a smile. “We’ll be at mama’s house for way longer if we do that.”

  I didn’t know anything about apartments so I nodded my head. “That’s why they say no credit is just like bad credit?”

  “Exactly.”

  I sighed and stared out of the window. I could solve almost any equation you put in front of me, I could name all fifty states and their capitals, and I could speak three different languages; but when it came to the real world, I was clueless.

  My parents didn’t teach me anything about life. All I knew was that I was supposed to make good grades, go to college, and get a good job. Sex, relationships, and babies were never a topic of conversation in my household. Hell, I was never taught how to go about purchasing a house or a car; I guess those things were just supposed to come to me.

  “Why are you looking like that?” Flip asked. I looked up and saw a pair of concerned eyes staring at me. Instantly, I felt my chest get heavy and my throat felt like it was closing. I turned my attention to the window to try and fight my tears. I didn’t want Flip to think I was acting like a baby, but I honestly felt like one.

  I didn’t know how to explain to him what was wrong with me because I didn’t understand it myself. I just didn’t feel like me. I felt like I was a shadow of the person that I used to be. But I didn’t know how to tell him that. So I went with the easiest answer.

  “I just can’t believe Aunt Mel really made me leave.”

  Flip smacked his lips. “Something is wrong with that lady. But it’s cool; you know I got you and ZaZa. We’ll figure something out.”

  “What am I going to do about the rest of this semester? How am I going to get to school? It’s too late to switch to online classes.”

  I watched Flip rub his temples and got quiet. The last thing I wanted to do was throw all my problems on him. He was trying to be as supportive as he could and I really appreciated him for it.

  “Sorry,” I said. “I don’t want to worry you.”

  Flip rested his hand on my thigh and squeezed gently. “We’ll figure something out. For now, let’s just take things one step at a time.”

  I nodded my head and rested my hand on top of his. I leaned my head back and let out a deep breath. I had a big issue with over-thinking everything. Sometimes, I feel like my brain just wouldn’t shut off and it caused me to stress over every little thing.

  I was taught that there was a solution to every problem and my goal was to find it; so all my life, that’s what I tried to do. But life wasn’t easy. There was no textbook or formula for that and it scared the shit out of me.

  “Eat-eat!”

  I looked in the backseat and saw my beautiful daughter’s face and felt a wave of relief flow through my body. I pulled a bag of chops out my purse and handed my daughter a Cheeto puff. I watched her eyes light up and wished my life could go back to being that simple.

  “Thant-tu” she cooed, jamming the chip in her mouth.

  I smiled and turned back in my seat. I caught Flip smiling too and for a moment, I didn’t have any worries. It felt good knowing that I wasn’t alone in the world. Flip wasn’t perfect, but he made sure that he took care of me and our daughter and I couldn’t be more thankful for that.

  “I love you, Flip.”

  “I love you more, Booty,” he said with a smirk because I snarled like I always did when he called me that. Even though I pretended to hate the name, I thought it was kind of cute. Especially since he’d been calling me that for years.

  I threw a chip into my mouth and sung along with the radio for the rest of the ride, finally feeling better about my future. At least, that’s what I had finally convinced myself.

  Flip’s mother Martha greeted me with a big hug and a warm smile when I arrived at her house. I almost cried in her arms because her embrace was so refreshing. I couldn’t remember the last time I felt that motherly touch.

  She pulled away and looked at me. “Girl, I promise you young girls know how to bounce back! You don’t even look like you had a baby!” She took my arm and twirled me around. “If it wasn’t for that butt, I would think you haven’t been eating!”

  “That ass sitting right, ain’t it mama?” Flip smiled as he walked into the kitchen holding ZaZa.

  “Aww” ZaZa said, putting her hand over Flip’s mouth.

  “Aww is right! Daddy said a bad word, didn’t he?” I smiled as ZaZa nodded her head up and down. She was so alert and smart that it amazed me.

  “You want Nanny to give him a spank-spank?” Ms. Martha asked, raising a hand in the air.

  ZaZa giggled and nodded again, so Ms. Martha popped Flip’s hand a few times, which tickled ZaZa. Her squeal made everybody laugh and before we knew it, we were all cracking up. I couldn’t remember the last time I felt so happy, but that’s what Flip’s family would do to you.

  Unlike my parents, who were strict and by the books, Flip’s mom was very loving and involved with her children. Flip and his younger sister Brooklyn were very close with their mother and could talk to her about anything without fear of being judged.

  When I first met them, I was shocked at the way they were open with one another. It was like they were friends, but they still respected her as their parent. I was afraid she wouldn’t like me because of how reserved I was, but she understood my upbringing and did her best to make sure that I was comfortable around them.

  Ms. Martha grabbed ZaZa from Flip’s arms and walked out of the kitchen with her. “I’m kidnapping her for the night. Don’t bother us,” she called over her shoulder before disappearing.

  Flip shook his head and looked at me. “You knew that was coming.”

  I laughed and nodded my head. “Yes, I did. She is crazy over her grandchild.”

  “It’s a pot roast on the stove if y’all hungry,” Ms. Martha said, peeking her head back in. She looked at me, then over at Flip. “Fix her a plate; she looks hungry.”

  “Am I really that small?” I asked, looking at myself. I mean, I may have been slimming down due to stress, but I didn’t think I was that skinny.

  Flip ran his eyes over me and licked his lips seductively. “You look good as hell to me.” He walked toward me and wrapped his arms around me. “I wanna sit you on this counter and fuck the shit out of you.”

  I giggled and shook my head no although my body was screaming yes. Flip was my only sexual partner and he was all I needed. That man knew how to do some things to my body that I didn’t even think was possible. I stood on my tip-toes and kissed him passionately. “We got the room to ourselves tonight.”

  “Eww, get a room!”

  I looked over my shoulder and saw my Flip’s sixteen year old sister Brooklyn. Her forehead wore a frown, but there was a smirk on her lips. “Y’all just nasty.”

  “Your face nasty,” Flip retorted, releasing me from his grip, but not before discreetly palming my vagina. “Stop hating.”

  “Ain’t nobody hating on y’all. I got my own man to freak on,” she replied jokingly.

  Flip’s face got serious. “Stop playing with me before I knock you and that nigga out.”

  Brooklyn walked over to the stove with her hands up. “Calm down, I’m just playing.”

  “Yeah, you better be.” Flip kissed my forehead. “I’m about to go get all the shit out of the car and put it in the room. You need anything?”